It’s a Friday evening. I am sitting on my bed, listening to classical music and trying to muster up enough energy to go hang out with the drama teacher. The sad truth is that, for the life of a teacher, Friday evenings often consist of doing not much more than putting on your pjs and watching a movie. Or at least that’s what sounds appealing, because you’re just plain exhausted at the end of the week.
I shouldn’t be complaining though, because this was only a three day week. Tuesday was Brazil’s independence day. We (the new teachers) spent the long weekend at a hot springs resort called Caldas Novas. It was a weekend of a lot of relaxing by the pool and shopping the very touristy town. Unfortunately there wasn’t much to do in the way of hiking or nature, which is what I was kind of hoping for. Because there was so much time with such a little agenda (something that hasn’t occurred since I moved here!) I got a bit homesick. But, all in all, it was a fun weekend and a good chance to connect with the new friends I’ve made here.
I was talking with Crystal, one of my roommates on the bus ride back, about how everything is going. I told her that for me transitions are hard. It can take up to two months of feeling funky emotionally while I adjust to a new setting, routine, culture, etc. I feel like I’ve been in transition mode for a long time. Transitioning out of Lampost and out of “college student” mode. One month periods of being at home and then nannying in Cedar Falls. Then moving to another continent and starting to teach full time. I have tried to be more graceful with myself, because I know that it takes awhile, and these have been big changes. But, I’m sick of being in transition mode. To be more specific, I feel like I haven’t quite been myself, especially the last few weeks. I think a big factor is being around people that don’t know me very well, and as a result, not fully being 100% myself (this is a life long struggle for me—attempting to live up to my perceptions of others’ expectations). I told Crystal that I feel like I’ve been live in pale shades, and that I want to be more vibrant. I want to fully live each moment to the fullest, in brave honesty and with eyes wide open. Life is too short (my time in Brazil is too short) to be living half way. You can keep me accountable for that!
Friday, September 10, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
You are what you think
It's late (well, for a tired elementary teacher), but I really wanted to share what I've been learning over the last week.
One thing I feel like I've been struggling with while being here in Brazil is feeling very tense and anxious-- between balancing all the newness, trying to be on top of my game for teaching, and transitioning into this new stage of my life. I was feeling uptight, and it has been affecting my health-- back pain, headaches, stomachaches, mentally and physically not being able to relax.
I joined a bible study from some people from at school. We're going through this book called "Battlefield of the Mind." The premise of the book is that a lot of spiritual battles occur and begin in the mind. Our thoughts produce the fruits of our actions-- the thoughts that are circling in our heads will affect our outlook on life. There is so much power in choosing to think things that are the truth and things that are positive. Choosing to praise, be thankful, focus on His beauty, and believe to see ourselves as HE sees us. This is the task of each moment. And because he exists in the present moment, our only obligation is to be present in the present and to seek His truth for that moment. And the next moment, and the next moment (Victorious lives are made up of victorious moments). It's choosing to believe that the lies we are tempted to live in are a weak and pale comparison to the vibrant life he is offering.
I can't believe how much of a difference this shift in my mindset has helped me be able to have a sense of peace in my day. The difficulties are still present, but I feel much more joyful and able to breathe.
Please pray for the grace to be able to continue to walk in this mindset. To constantly renew my mind in the truth and to choose to dwell in the light.
One thing I feel like I've been struggling with while being here in Brazil is feeling very tense and anxious-- between balancing all the newness, trying to be on top of my game for teaching, and transitioning into this new stage of my life. I was feeling uptight, and it has been affecting my health-- back pain, headaches, stomachaches, mentally and physically not being able to relax.
I joined a bible study from some people from at school. We're going through this book called "Battlefield of the Mind." The premise of the book is that a lot of spiritual battles occur and begin in the mind. Our thoughts produce the fruits of our actions-- the thoughts that are circling in our heads will affect our outlook on life. There is so much power in choosing to think things that are the truth and things that are positive. Choosing to praise, be thankful, focus on His beauty, and believe to see ourselves as HE sees us. This is the task of each moment. And because he exists in the present moment, our only obligation is to be present in the present and to seek His truth for that moment. And the next moment, and the next moment (Victorious lives are made up of victorious moments). It's choosing to believe that the lies we are tempted to live in are a weak and pale comparison to the vibrant life he is offering.
I can't believe how much of a difference this shift in my mindset has helped me be able to have a sense of peace in my day. The difficulties are still present, but I feel much more joyful and able to breathe.
Please pray for the grace to be able to continue to walk in this mindset. To constantly renew my mind in the truth and to choose to dwell in the light.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Sunday- Funday!
Hello-
So it's a Sunday afternoon, and I'm sitting in the living room with my two roommates! That's right-- it's officially all three of us-- Crystal arrived this Wednesday. I can remember last winter when we were all collaborating and talking about the possibility of coming here to Brazil. 6 months later, here we are! It still hits me sometimes with how surreal it is!
On Friday I had my first day of teaching all day without the cooperating teacher there. Erin was doing literacy testing all day. It was... good, but exhausting. I'm still trying to figure out the whole classroom management situation.
This will be a short blog, because I'm headed out to a Japanese festival with some friends. there is a large population of Japanese in Brazil. It should be fun!
I'm doing well, but still trying to find a balance in it all-- learning that I don't need to be perfect, finding out what I need to be mentally, physically, and spiritually healthy, and discovering what I need to do to meet those needs. It's a challenge everyday, but it's met with victories and learning opportunities.
More soon!
So it's a Sunday afternoon, and I'm sitting in the living room with my two roommates! That's right-- it's officially all three of us-- Crystal arrived this Wednesday. I can remember last winter when we were all collaborating and talking about the possibility of coming here to Brazil. 6 months later, here we are! It still hits me sometimes with how surreal it is!
On Friday I had my first day of teaching all day without the cooperating teacher there. Erin was doing literacy testing all day. It was... good, but exhausting. I'm still trying to figure out the whole classroom management situation.
This will be a short blog, because I'm headed out to a Japanese festival with some friends. there is a large population of Japanese in Brazil. It should be fun!
I'm doing well, but still trying to find a balance in it all-- learning that I don't need to be perfect, finding out what I need to be mentally, physically, and spiritually healthy, and discovering what I need to do to meet those needs. It's a challenge everyday, but it's met with victories and learning opportunities.
More soon!
Saturday, August 21, 2010
One month
I have officially been here for one month. Wow-- it's crazy-- and I'm not sure if it feels like it's flown by or that I've been here for a long time--- I suppose it's a little bit of both.
I'm sorry that I haven't written in awhile. I will catch you up.
I am starting to teach in the classroom bit by bit. I have two guided reading groups (small groups that meet each day for 20 minutes), and I am teaching social studies-- which I will use as my big unit plan that I turn in to the university. I am doing the unit on communities.
The students are absolutely adorable, and a handful! The stories they tell, the things they do when they think no one is looking, and the little hugs I get make me love this job! I feel as though this is the right career for me because it is so easy to come to school and throw my heart into what I'm doing there! Which, needless to say, means I am EXHAUSTED by the time school is done. A highlight of my week was being in bed by 9 one night! It is very easy to let school consume your life. Several teachers have given me the wise advice to do your best and commit to excellence, but to set boundaries and have a balanced life, so as to keep your sanity! I think this is a good thing to keep in mind, because this is a job that is never done-- there's always something else to get done.
I got to go to church with Erin, my cooperating teacher last week, and it was so refreshing to go-- I hadn't been able to go for several weeks. The corporate worship was very refreshing. While it was very nice to go to an English speaking church, I wasn't sure if it was a church that I would necessarily go to if there were other options. I am currently praying about what I should do about that.
I think above all, my heart is longing for fellowship. While I feel that I'm adjusting well, there is such a shock of newness to everything: new country, new language, new career, new schedule, new group of friends, new climate, new lifestyle, new things to do on the weekends, new choices that need to be made-- new EVERYTHING! On the one hand, I feel like everything is going so smoothly-- there's just a "rightness" about being here right now. And yet, there is also a degree of chaos- inside of me. I feel just a little bit out of whack from the transitions.
As the first month has past, and I'm settling into a routine, I want to be able to find a sense of balance. Here's what I'm working on and learning:
-I need to take time to re center-- time for solitude, rest, and not having to "be on" on a regular basis
-Being fully present in the moment (and not being anxious about what the next season will hold)
-Letting God be in control of situations, my future, relationships etc.
-Being unapologetic about who I am and what I need
-Failing with grace- learning from my mistakes and claiming the victories as they come
-Seeking His face each day with joy and grace
I'm sorry that I haven't written in awhile. I will catch you up.
I am starting to teach in the classroom bit by bit. I have two guided reading groups (small groups that meet each day for 20 minutes), and I am teaching social studies-- which I will use as my big unit plan that I turn in to the university. I am doing the unit on communities.
The students are absolutely adorable, and a handful! The stories they tell, the things they do when they think no one is looking, and the little hugs I get make me love this job! I feel as though this is the right career for me because it is so easy to come to school and throw my heart into what I'm doing there! Which, needless to say, means I am EXHAUSTED by the time school is done. A highlight of my week was being in bed by 9 one night! It is very easy to let school consume your life. Several teachers have given me the wise advice to do your best and commit to excellence, but to set boundaries and have a balanced life, so as to keep your sanity! I think this is a good thing to keep in mind, because this is a job that is never done-- there's always something else to get done.
I got to go to church with Erin, my cooperating teacher last week, and it was so refreshing to go-- I hadn't been able to go for several weeks. The corporate worship was very refreshing. While it was very nice to go to an English speaking church, I wasn't sure if it was a church that I would necessarily go to if there were other options. I am currently praying about what I should do about that.
I think above all, my heart is longing for fellowship. While I feel that I'm adjusting well, there is such a shock of newness to everything: new country, new language, new career, new schedule, new group of friends, new climate, new lifestyle, new things to do on the weekends, new choices that need to be made-- new EVERYTHING! On the one hand, I feel like everything is going so smoothly-- there's just a "rightness" about being here right now. And yet, there is also a degree of chaos- inside of me. I feel just a little bit out of whack from the transitions.
As the first month has past, and I'm settling into a routine, I want to be able to find a sense of balance. Here's what I'm working on and learning:
-I need to take time to re center-- time for solitude, rest, and not having to "be on" on a regular basis
-Being fully present in the moment (and not being anxious about what the next season will hold)
-Letting God be in control of situations, my future, relationships etc.
-Being unapologetic about who I am and what I need
-Failing with grace- learning from my mistakes and claiming the victories as they come
-Seeking His face each day with joy and grace
Saturday, August 14, 2010
One Week down!
I have officially completed my first week of school. It was intense! I don't know if you've ever been in a first grade classroom during the first week of school, but it is a high maintainence bunch of six year olds!
I quickly fell in love with the kids-- they are so adorable! A majority of them are from Brazil, three do not speak English, while the others have varying degrees. We also have a couple of American students, as well as a Sweedish and German students. I love, love, love having little hands on my arm asking "Miss Allie, Miss Allie, can you help me spell this word?" They are really sweet!
But, they are also really tiring! When they come into first grade, they are not really used to a full day of structured learning, so by the time the afternoon rolls around, they are much more squirrley! I get a bit flustered when they are out of control, but Erin seems to stay pretty calm (maybe that comes with years of experience!)
I have definitely been sleeping well at night. I'm very glad that Friday came-- I need a weekend of rest and recooperation!
I quickly fell in love with the kids-- they are so adorable! A majority of them are from Brazil, three do not speak English, while the others have varying degrees. We also have a couple of American students, as well as a Sweedish and German students. I love, love, love having little hands on my arm asking "Miss Allie, Miss Allie, can you help me spell this word?" They are really sweet!
But, they are also really tiring! When they come into first grade, they are not really used to a full day of structured learning, so by the time the afternoon rolls around, they are much more squirrley! I get a bit flustered when they are out of control, but Erin seems to stay pretty calm (maybe that comes with years of experience!)
I have definitely been sleeping well at night. I'm very glad that Friday came-- I need a weekend of rest and recooperation!
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Weekend
It's been a very relaxing weekend here in Brasila!
Friday night: Sabrina, a very sweet Portuguese teacher from school, invited Natalia, Jana, and I to go to the Brazilian cinema. So we went to Salt (it was in English, with Portuguese subtitles). Sabrina taught us how to ask for a ticket in Portuguese, but when I got up to the counter, I got flustered and I think I sputtered in broken Portuguese "I want Salt"... but they understood. (Most people have this smirk on their face, when I say "Nao fallo Portugues" and laugh as they get me what I'm attempting to ask for)
Saturday: Dival, the human resources guy at EAB had a huge party at his house. He lives in a very nice neighborhood and has this beautiful house. Once again, I was astounded at the amount and scale of hospitality that we were showed. Imagine a beautiful, cloudless day, a georgeous patio, with tables set up with food and drinks, a full staff of chefs grilling meat and other appetizers, a DJ playing all sorts of music, and about 50 Brazilians laughing and enjoying life. It was surreal, amazing, relaxing, and well... Brazil! I left around 4:30 and enjoyed a quiet evening at home.
Sunday: I woke up and had a "date with God" (I haven't been able to find anyone to go to church with yet, and it's too far to walk, so I had some time alone with God by myself. I went to this cute little shop called Confectaria Francesa. I sipped on a Cafe con Leiche (comparable to a cappuccino-- very strong) and listened to some live saxophone music while I read and journaled. I had some time just to pray and listen and read the word. It was very refreshing. Tonight, we are going to a musical put on by a local high school-- called "Bom Dia Boltimore" It is Hairspray, but in Portuguese! I'm very excited, because hopefully I will be able to follow along because I've seen the Broadway version when it came to UNI a couple of years ago.
I'm excited for the first day of school tomorrow! I had an opportunity to meet some of my students at the Open house they had at school on Friday, and they are very adorable. I think that it will be great to get the school year started!!!
Friday night: Sabrina, a very sweet Portuguese teacher from school, invited Natalia, Jana, and I to go to the Brazilian cinema. So we went to Salt (it was in English, with Portuguese subtitles). Sabrina taught us how to ask for a ticket in Portuguese, but when I got up to the counter, I got flustered and I think I sputtered in broken Portuguese "I want Salt"... but they understood. (Most people have this smirk on their face, when I say "Nao fallo Portugues" and laugh as they get me what I'm attempting to ask for)
Saturday: Dival, the human resources guy at EAB had a huge party at his house. He lives in a very nice neighborhood and has this beautiful house. Once again, I was astounded at the amount and scale of hospitality that we were showed. Imagine a beautiful, cloudless day, a georgeous patio, with tables set up with food and drinks, a full staff of chefs grilling meat and other appetizers, a DJ playing all sorts of music, and about 50 Brazilians laughing and enjoying life. It was surreal, amazing, relaxing, and well... Brazil! I left around 4:30 and enjoyed a quiet evening at home.
Sunday: I woke up and had a "date with God" (I haven't been able to find anyone to go to church with yet, and it's too far to walk, so I had some time alone with God by myself. I went to this cute little shop called Confectaria Francesa. I sipped on a Cafe con Leiche (comparable to a cappuccino-- very strong) and listened to some live saxophone music while I read and journaled. I had some time just to pray and listen and read the word. It was very refreshing. Tonight, we are going to a musical put on by a local high school-- called "Bom Dia Boltimore" It is Hairspray, but in Portuguese! I'm very excited, because hopefully I will be able to follow along because I've seen the Broadway version when it came to UNI a couple of years ago.
I'm excited for the first day of school tomorrow! I had an opportunity to meet some of my students at the Open house they had at school on Friday, and they are very adorable. I think that it will be great to get the school year started!!!
Thursday, August 5, 2010
And so it begins...
Hello!
This week has been a whirlwind-- of new faces, teaching lingo, bulletin boards, and staff development. AKA- it's teacher training time. It's so great to be experiencing the beginning of the school year, as so much happens at this time for schools. As student teachers, we are welcomed and treated as if we were new teachers.
I met my cooperating teachers:
Erin Hayes: She will be my first cooperating teacher. She is enthusiastic, always smiling, and everybody's friend, from teachers to parents to students to maintainence. She has a big heart and I think I'm really going to like working with her.
Kristy Ngyuen: She teaches second grade. She is a very graceful, soft-spoken, beautiful teacher. Originally from Korea, she has lived in several places around the world and loves to travel. She took me out to dinner on Sunday night and I got to know her a bit. I think she has quite a different teaching style to Erin, so it will be good to get two different looks at ways to run a classroom.
I've been able to put my creativity to use this week by putting up bulletin boards. I'm quite proud of the display on our front door. It says "Soaring to new heights in first grade" and it has each child's name on a hot air balloon. Cute.
Tomorrow, all the parents and students will come in the afternoon for an open house. This is exciting, because I'm ready for the school year to start and I'm really excited to meet the students. I'm also a bit nervous, because of all the parents (many of them are wealthy, influencial diplomats, or staff members of the school!) I'm sure it will be fine.
My time here has been so rich with opportunities to grow personally. There is so much new! Every aspect of my life is so completely different than it was two weeks ago. Right now, I'm still trying to find my balance (and not trip on the broken sidewalks on my way to school!) It's good. It's crazy. It's exactly where I need to be right now.
This week has been a whirlwind-- of new faces, teaching lingo, bulletin boards, and staff development. AKA- it's teacher training time. It's so great to be experiencing the beginning of the school year, as so much happens at this time for schools. As student teachers, we are welcomed and treated as if we were new teachers.
I met my cooperating teachers:
Erin Hayes: She will be my first cooperating teacher. She is enthusiastic, always smiling, and everybody's friend, from teachers to parents to students to maintainence. She has a big heart and I think I'm really going to like working with her.
Kristy Ngyuen: She teaches second grade. She is a very graceful, soft-spoken, beautiful teacher. Originally from Korea, she has lived in several places around the world and loves to travel. She took me out to dinner on Sunday night and I got to know her a bit. I think she has quite a different teaching style to Erin, so it will be good to get two different looks at ways to run a classroom.
I've been able to put my creativity to use this week by putting up bulletin boards. I'm quite proud of the display on our front door. It says "Soaring to new heights in first grade" and it has each child's name on a hot air balloon. Cute.
Tomorrow, all the parents and students will come in the afternoon for an open house. This is exciting, because I'm ready for the school year to start and I'm really excited to meet the students. I'm also a bit nervous, because of all the parents (many of them are wealthy, influencial diplomats, or staff members of the school!) I'm sure it will be fine.
My time here has been so rich with opportunities to grow personally. There is so much new! Every aspect of my life is so completely different than it was two weeks ago. Right now, I'm still trying to find my balance (and not trip on the broken sidewalks on my way to school!) It's good. It's crazy. It's exactly where I need to be right now.
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